Rivais Mortos Crime Family

~~Mascotics~~

+1 very solid back story and these dudes seem to have a great head on their shoulders. I'd be interested to see how this goes about. Much like many others, they seem to want a bit more diversity in the city.

I believe the responses to the guy that corrected all of the grammar in the original story was just a natural response. I don't think it should be taken into account in the final decision on the application.

**Cätbøy** · 12-22-2022, 04:19 AM

(12-21-2022, 03:26 AM)plixily Wrote:
(12-19-2022, 12:40 AM)Cätbøy Wrote: So, as an actual Brazilian, I really like the idea of a Brazilian faction but I fail to understand some things.

In your faction backstory, you don't mention any key members or their motives, it's rather short, and there's no real effort put into it in my opinion. All you say basically is "we were poor, we worked and stole from people, then we wanted to move out but didn't know where to, then we decided the USA, then we arrived and started robbing people there too".

Also, your brief description of what the faction strives for in NY sounds more like a civil rights movement goal than what a crime family wants.

Not a +1, but not a -1 either.
Thanks for your reply we have updated the back story and overall polished the app give it another look and tell us what you think

Looks way better. I definitely like that way more than the old one. The backstory clearly had more time and thought put into it.
I do think that the "Porto Alegre Gang" could have another name, but it's fine lol.
Regardless, looks way better and I'd be interested in seeing this work. Who knows... maybe I'll join too.

+1

**Yuki** · 12-22-2022, 06:06 AM

(12-21-2022, 06:33 AM)Mascotics Wrote: +1 very solid back story and these dudes seem to have a great head on their shoulders. I'd be interested to see how this goes about. Much like many others, they seem to want a bit more diversity in the city.

I believe the responses to the guy that corrected all of the grammar in the original story was just a natural response. I don't think it should be taken into account in the final decision on the application.

I mean if someone has an outburst and does something like that to an correction I wouldn't say that's the type of person who's high up in leading a group would you want someone irrational and prone to outburst in a position of power but that's just me it seems

**CallMeRanchCuzIBeDressing** · 12-23-2022, 02:38 AM

+1 This story is deep i freaking love it

~~Mascotics~~ · 12-24-2022, 04:15 PM

(12-22-2022, 06:06 AM)zHero213 Wrote:
(12-21-2022, 06:33 AM)Mascotics Wrote: +1 very solid back story and these dudes seem to have a great head on their shoulders. I'd be interested to see how this goes about. Much like many others, they seem to want a bit more diversity in the city.

I believe the responses to the guy that corrected all of the grammar in the original story was just a natural response. I don't think it should be taken into account in the final decision on the application.
I mean if someone has an outburst and does something like that to an correction I wouldn't say that's the type of person who's high up in leading a group would you want someone irrational and prone to outburst in a position of power but that's just me it seems

In all fairness, if you sat down and critiqued something of mine that closely for something other than a University English class, I'd probably be a little irritated at it as well. I mean, at the end of the day, it's a video game. He took the time to correct it and seek out further opinions on the concept. Seems like a decent fella to me.

**cherryredlikemynips** · 12-25-2022, 03:07 AM

+1 I think this is a really good idea I read over the backstory, and I genuinely think it was a work of art also I would love to join this faction if it got accepted all and all I think this should definitely get accepted

**Saul White** · 12-26-2022, 04:50 AM

+1 Hell yeah "city of god" roleplay

**Etafive** · 12-26-2022, 06:06 PM

(12-24-2022, 04:15 PM)Mascotics Wrote:
(12-22-2022, 06:06 AM)zHero213 Wrote:
(12-21-2022, 06:33 AM)Mascotics Wrote: +1 very solid back story and these dudes seem to have a great head on their shoulders. I'd be interested to see how this goes about. Much like many others, they seem to want a bit more diversity in the city.

I believe the responses to the guy that corrected all of the grammar in the original story was just a natural response. I don't think it should be taken into account in the final decision on the application.
I mean if someone has an outburst and does something like that to an correction I wouldn't say that's the type of person who's high up in leading a group would you want someone irrational and prone to outburst in a position of power but that's just me it seems

In all fairness, if you sat down and critiqued something of mine that closely for something other than a University English class, I'd probably be a little irritated at it as well. I mean, at the end of the day, it's a video game. He took the time to correct it and seek out further opinions on the concept. Seems like a decent fella to me.

In all fairness if you reacted like that you shouldn't be an admin....

**Tables** · 12-29-2022, 06:56 AM

+1 Pretty based tbh

**Yoka** · 12-30-2022, 01:54 AM

+1 I read their back story and I love the part where they had to help their mother survive because it was a very deep part of the backstory. Also, I think it would be amazing to have a brand-new faction in the city and this would be the perfect one for this. I hope this gets accepted cause I would love to join.